I felt so sick about everything that happened - just like acomplete garbage person - and I thought maybe if I gave you enough time,you'd find it in yo...r heart to forgive me or something. But then I keptthinking that maybe what I'd done was so bad that that might never happen.What if you never forgive me? What if that was it for us? And then Istarted to panic. You're my best friend, Elles. Hell, you're probably theonly real friend I've got; the only person who actually sees me for me. Thethought. We shared a bottle of wine and clinked glasses at each round. It was rote, but we enjoyed it nonetheless. Nothing on the television interested us until a documentary on children. Then Tammy began her nightly cry.Children. " That's what I never got a chance to give Michael," she said tearfully." You were married for less than a year, honey. You were both so young; how can you expect to have mothered kids when you were both still enjoying your youth?" But I wanted kids, Daddy. And Mike did too.. Do you think it has meaning?”“I read something online once that said the possibility of a coincidence occurring at any given time is always one hundred percent. It was a coincidence that I was wheeled into the physical therapy room just when you were up for the next appointment. It was a coincidence that you ran in the park where Em and I did. It was a coincidence that you spotted me running alone. It was...”“I get it. It was a coincidence that I fell in love with you. All from the start of. I also assumed it would coincide with a new found maturity, a pension, a mortgage, an understanding partner, 2.5 children and a preference for serious news rather than cartoons. It seems someone forgot to mention to the academy that I’m way past graduation. I mean, I’m ready for it. My model of old age was created very suddenly at 7. ‘When I grow old, I want to be just like great grandma’. At 7, being old represented a delicious freedom, no more cooking lessons ‘because a woman has to know how.
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